How come men will never stop the car to let you go to the bathroom?
Negotiating pee breaks is like negotiating world peace. Utmost diplomacy must be used and proper wording is crucial. There must be ceremony and goodwill fostered – gifts exchanged – before the two parties sit down at the negotiating table. Big things are at stake here.
“Are you planning on stopping for gas soon?”
“Um OK. “Hungry?”
“How far to the next town?”
“I could use a washroom, you know, when it is convenient to stop.” I smile hopefully.
I try again, “You know, like if you happen to see a rest stop along the way and it is easy to pull off … I am not desperate yet or anything, I am just trying to give you good notice that I will need to stop in the next hour ok?”
“Ya sure, we can see …”
I have considered just saying “OK.”
…and peeing on the front seat … Continue reading “I Just Wanna Pee!!”
Good Bad Any Home – 10 Billion Butterflies.
Queensland has a butterfly swarm going on right now. Millions of butterflies are in the skies as those from further west are heading our way in search of food.
Every time I step outside it literally feels like I am stuck in one of those over the top, entitlement obsessed weddings where the bride and groom are not allowed to move without there being an entourage of people to move the dress, a harp and stringed instruments to background the whole thing, and butterflies or doves being released.
One could argue that a swarm of millions of butterflies is much nicer than a swarm of bees. I would argue that at least with a swarm of bees death is a real possibility. This has been going on for days. I constantly have people telling me there is something in my teeth and I have to remove a butterfly wing or even a leg or arm … Continue reading “10 Billion Free Butterflies.”